Lime
Saturday, February 28, 2009
Math Test and Spring Break
I am writing this entry now simply because I was too occupied to care to write it yesterday, sue me. In any case, the day before spring break was considerably mellow up until the point everyone dragged themselves to the long-dreaded math exam or situation of evaluation, as they so eloquently regurgitate it. I’m not going to bring up any points about any specific questions in the exam for I fear some students following the blog might attempt to remove the painful memory of the exam with a knife...through their head. For others, the exam went from well to very well, so I’m not necessarily speaking for myself, but the general consensus was that the exam was a female dog. Does anyone care much about the exam now? Not really. Why? Because it’s spring break. Yay for social decadence (sarcasm implied). Of course, this means that we won’t be posting articles for a week (yes, our holiday is that short). To close this article, I wish, to anyone going to some festivity in a warmer region to fall into the ephemeral bliss of love...and end up with an STI.
Lime
Lime
Thursday, February 26, 2009
When Hell goes on break
Hell is going on break in exactly 18 hours, 56 minutes at the moment these words are being typed.
We are happy. Not much to bitch about, except maybe the retarded English writing test. ENG teacher can't figure out what she wants; movie review or persuasive essay. Nearly half the class wrote theirs in advance. Why is she teaching us? All of her material is copied & pasted from the Internet, sometimes without a reference. Fatal mistake. I could learn it at home myself.
But, all in all, everybody is in a smashin' mood. Most people have planned an array of activities, from hitting the slopes, to partying, to sleeping, to vacations down south&cruises, to... you know.
Just one more day to tough out. Shouldn't be difficult. I'm predicting at least one person will get trampled in the locker room stampede that will certainly be worse than usual.
Day's extra: Irish/Gaelic insult: "As Thick As Manure And Only Half As Useful."
*Hope that enriched your book of sayings*
We are happy. Not much to bitch about, except maybe the retarded English writing test. ENG teacher can't figure out what she wants; movie review or persuasive essay. Nearly half the class wrote theirs in advance. Why is she teaching us? All of her material is copied & pasted from the Internet, sometimes without a reference. Fatal mistake. I could learn it at home myself.
But, all in all, everybody is in a smashin' mood. Most people have planned an array of activities, from hitting the slopes, to partying, to sleeping, to vacations down south&cruises, to... you know.
Just one more day to tough out. Shouldn't be difficult. I'm predicting at least one person will get trampled in the locker room stampede that will certainly be worse than usual.
Day's extra: Irish/Gaelic insult: "As Thick As Manure And Only Half As Useful."
*Hope that enriched your book of sayings*
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
White Day
White day: A day where the school leaves school and heads out to various locations to practice winter activities. This definition should be altered to :
A day where the school leaves school and heads out to various locations to practice winter activities and 25% of the students don't show up.
To those who didn't turn up, a gift for you: a healthy kick to the groin. You're welcome
Anyways, White day turned black when the power went out. Yes, the power went out. Dead middle of winter and the power goes out. Unluckily, we weren't at school. We were already outside freezing—but also having fun with friends. Hopefully Hydro Quebec won't have gotten it fixed by tomorrow which means we won't have school. However, it's unlikely, because Hydro QC has gotten quite a lot of experience following the '98 ice storm. Really froze their butts, that one did. As Scarface said: "Hope equals disappointment". (Incidentally, those were the wisest words he's ever said since he intoned: "Treat every gun as if it were loaded" and almost shot himself shortly thereafter.)
So let's not hope and pray too much. I'm sure God is tired of hearing us. Besides, he hasn't made anything happen yet. Should we try the Devil instead?(I'm just keeping all options open, you never know.)
If indeed tomorrow would be a no school day, it would open up a realm of possibilities. The students could each pitch in a few dollars, and the collected money could be used to bribe an Hydro QC worker to "accidentally" shut off power to the school. It would give us a well deserved day off once in awhile. The poorly paid worker would be better off as well. On the long term, it might even persuade CSMB to relocate to a newer building. (O miracle!)
A day where the school leaves school and heads out to various locations to practice winter activities and 25% of the students don't show up.
To those who didn't turn up, a gift for you: a healthy kick to the groin. You're welcome
Anyways, White day turned black when the power went out. Yes, the power went out. Dead middle of winter and the power goes out. Unluckily, we weren't at school. We were already outside freezing—but also having fun with friends. Hopefully Hydro Quebec won't have gotten it fixed by tomorrow which means we won't have school. However, it's unlikely, because Hydro QC has gotten quite a lot of experience following the '98 ice storm. Really froze their butts, that one did. As Scarface said: "Hope equals disappointment". (Incidentally, those were the wisest words he's ever said since he intoned: "Treat every gun as if it were loaded" and almost shot himself shortly thereafter.)
So let's not hope and pray too much. I'm sure God is tired of hearing us. Besides, he hasn't made anything happen yet. Should we try the Devil instead?(I'm just keeping all options open, you never know.)
If indeed tomorrow would be a no school day, it would open up a realm of possibilities. The students could each pitch in a few dollars, and the collected money could be used to bribe an Hydro QC worker to "accidentally" shut off power to the school. It would give us a well deserved day off once in awhile. The poorly paid worker would be better off as well. On the long term, it might even persuade CSMB to relocate to a newer building. (O miracle!)
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
The Rape
I think after four years of silence, it is time to overcome the shame and say:
We get raped at CSL. That is the horrible truth. We are violated EVERY DAY....
when we go into the locker room which houses between a hundred and two hundred lockers and two students per locker.
Allow me to explain.
Walls are lined with lockers, and three rows of lockers back to back form alleys that are at best 2 meters wide. There is only 3 exits. Naturally, when the day ends, its a Zerg rush for the lockers. After 8 hours at CSL, you would do the same. Anyways, suddenly, 400 of us are in a cramped space, all pushing, shoving and making our bodies impossibly small. It's like sperm trying to squeeze into the egg. You wish there could be artificial insemination and you could just be injected right beside your locker. As it is now, you need to spend a few minutes battling your way towards it. To further complicate matters, because certain people are already at their lockers, the alley is even smaller. A foot wide seems as much as you'll ever get and yet some people just stop dead in the middle to talk to a friend about some meaningless bullshit. Other inexperienced people who just don't learn, instead of kneeling, bend over to put on shoes, or pick up books which subjects them to an anal rape in addition to the unavoidable body rape already.
If there were to be a fire, first, we probably wouldn't even hear it. Second, the heat generated by 400 bodies can already melt chocolate, so we wouldn't feel the heat until some people's hair actually caught fire. For the same reason, 400 people in a small room generates a foul stench and low oxygen levels, which would prevent us from smelling any smoke as well. And if by some miracle (or curse) should we be aware of this, there would be a giant bottleneck. Only 3 exits for 400 frantic persons is not enough. It would be a huge jam, kind of like the bowels of someone stricken with constipation. Several people would probably get trampled as well as we burned.
Another terrifying thing would be if a Mr. X or Mr.Y suddenly decided he had enough and when on a rampage with a weapon. Think of the massacre. Anything from a chainsaw to a machine gun would have enormous potential in such a cramped environment.
All in all, another thing you learn at CSL because such things happen everyday out there and you need to be prepared.
=========================
My sincerest apologies if you were, by extreme misfortune, actually violated, burned and shot all at the same time 180 days a year.
We get raped at CSL. That is the horrible truth. We are violated EVERY DAY....
when we go into the locker room which houses between a hundred and two hundred lockers and two students per locker.
Allow me to explain.
Walls are lined with lockers, and three rows of lockers back to back form alleys that are at best 2 meters wide. There is only 3 exits. Naturally, when the day ends, its a Zerg rush for the lockers. After 8 hours at CSL, you would do the same. Anyways, suddenly, 400 of us are in a cramped space, all pushing, shoving and making our bodies impossibly small. It's like sperm trying to squeeze into the egg. You wish there could be artificial insemination and you could just be injected right beside your locker. As it is now, you need to spend a few minutes battling your way towards it. To further complicate matters, because certain people are already at their lockers, the alley is even smaller. A foot wide seems as much as you'll ever get and yet some people just stop dead in the middle to talk to a friend about some meaningless bullshit. Other inexperienced people who just don't learn, instead of kneeling, bend over to put on shoes, or pick up books which subjects them to an anal rape in addition to the unavoidable body rape already.
If there were to be a fire, first, we probably wouldn't even hear it. Second, the heat generated by 400 bodies can already melt chocolate, so we wouldn't feel the heat until some people's hair actually caught fire. For the same reason, 400 people in a small room generates a foul stench and low oxygen levels, which would prevent us from smelling any smoke as well. And if by some miracle (or curse) should we be aware of this, there would be a giant bottleneck. Only 3 exits for 400 frantic persons is not enough. It would be a huge jam, kind of like the bowels of someone stricken with constipation. Several people would probably get trampled as well as we burned.
Another terrifying thing would be if a Mr. X or Mr.Y suddenly decided he had enough and when on a rampage with a weapon. Think of the massacre. Anything from a chainsaw to a machine gun would have enormous potential in such a cramped environment.
All in all, another thing you learn at CSL because such things happen everyday out there and you need to be prepared.
=========================
My sincerest apologies if you were, by extreme misfortune, actually violated, burned and shot all at the same time 180 days a year.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)